9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Randomize