don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
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