I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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