the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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