Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
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They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
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everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
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