you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Randomize