party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
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