At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
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Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
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So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
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