Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
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I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
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