and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
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You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
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