God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
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