There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Randomize