try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
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