Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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