We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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