I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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