i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Randomize