How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Randomize