Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(404): View more from Georgia

Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.

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(404): Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that. http://tfl.nu/7nr6

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(423): View more from Tennessee

my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"

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(423): my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead" http://tfl.nu/865j

Replies (2) Good night (640) Bad night (1623) Order T-Shirt
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(973): View more from New Jersey

Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie

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(973): Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie http://tfl.nu/ez65

Replies (12) Good night (2382) Bad night (624) Order T-Shirt
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(781): View more from Massachusetts

At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes

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(781): At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes http://tfl.nu/p42l

Replies (10) Good night (3279) Bad night (1029) Order T-Shirt
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(954): View more from Florida

i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.

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(954): i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month. http://tfl.nu/t4na

Replies (4) Good night (3363) Bad night (473) Order T-Shirt
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(310): View more from California

Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.

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(310): Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you. http://tfl.nu/vvmp

Replies (21) Good night (5918) Bad night (1341) Order T-Shirt
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(847): View more from Illinois

Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers

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(847): Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers http://tfl.nu/3d71

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?

(856): View more from New Jersey

Right after we had the just friends talk..

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(610): At what point last night did I start ordering doubles? (856): Right after we had the just friends talk.. http://tfl.nu/zby8

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(323): View more from California

Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.

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(323): Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups. http://tfl.nu/guyb

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(408): View more from California

Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.

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(408): Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding. http://tfl.nu/o5ps

Replies (7) Good night (2666) Bad night (714) Order T-Shirt
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(207): View more from Maine

Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????

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(207): Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport???? http://tfl.nu/yffg

Replies (11) Good night (752) Bad night (3157)
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(417): View more from Missouri

I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard

(1-417): View more from Missouri

Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.

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(417): I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard (1-417): Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming. http://tfl.nu/52u7

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(325): View more from Texas

You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...

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(325): You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis... http://tfl.nu/1zk4

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(347): View more from New York

It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.

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(347): It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow. http://tfl.nu/mzdk

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.

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(610): spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN. http://tfl.nu/4bnj

Replies (12) Good night (909) Bad night (234) Order T-Shirt

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