she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
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