in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
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