Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize