elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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