Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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