Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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