i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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