No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
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