Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
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