my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize