at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize