I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
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