i used baking grease as lip gloss
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
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