She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Randomize