just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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