so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
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