god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
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