im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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