It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
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