"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
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