How'd it feel making her break her religion?
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
It's never too late to be topless.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Randomize