I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
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