Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize