Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
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Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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