i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're using joints as your birthday candles
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
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