i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
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I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
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Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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