this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
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