Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're making bets on your personal life
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
Randomize