My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
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