I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
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