so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
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